loser

God said im a loser

This weekend i was at the beach, for the first time since last year. It brings me undiscribable joy whenever im there. I always feel so much closer to God. It sounds silly but its the truth. I can sit for hours upon hours just listening to the sound of the ocean waves crashing. It blows my mind to think about the sand on the beach. Each grain of sand. I love watching the sunsets over the bay. It amazes me how wonderful a painter God can be. He decides what color the sun sets every night. I love realizing the beauty of God just by observing His creation. How he makes everything bloom on time, how He makes the stars shine just the right amount, how He chooses the colors of the sunsets, and how sometimes He makes the fluffy white clouds look like bunny rabbits just to make me smile. He is so Majestic! What a wonderful artist. Think about the creativity He has placed in each one of us. The art that we create is just a reflection of something he already did! Its just so cool to think of God as an artist. Just think about all the animals in the world, how God created each one to be so different. Thats why I love reading Genesis, though i wish sometimes it was more detailed, but what a poweful God we have, that He just speaks things and BAM, its there.

Lately God has been showing me what a loser i am. I am such a dumb human sometimes and I dont diserve His love. He is such a faithful provisioner. He blesses me with things i dont diserve at all. Sometimes my flesh gets the better of me, and I dont want to spend time with Jesus or pray or do anything..but He showed me that just because I stop, it doesnt mean He does. He continued to bless me in the times i really didnt want anything to do with Him. I was listening to the radio the other day, and the guy said the best thing to do with God is to be honest with Him. I was tired of huge things in my life changing and me not being happy, but time and time again He continues to remind me that He is constant and never changing. He is also a gentleman and will not force Himself upon me when I told him I dont really feel like talking to Him sometimes. In my stupid human selfishness..he is still faithful and wonderful to me. I am learning how to thank Him for everything he has given to me, and to realize i had nothing to do with any of it.










...His love is boundless