california dreamin

As of lately ive been thinking alot about dreams. Not the creepy ones that happen when you sleep...but ambitions,desires and goals i have for my life. I have so many things i want to do in my lifetime, but how do i know if its what God wants for me? I know he places things in our heart what he wants us to persue, but which ones do i do? I dont want to live a normal life. I dont want to go to college, get married and then settle down, have kids and just work or something like how most of the population of todays culture does. I want to do so much with my life. I want to travel and see the world, i want to be on a mission feild somewhere, i wanna go to CFNI and IHOP to do worship stuff,learn another language, go on a surfing vacation and just surf amazing beaches for a month, write a book, live in colorado, i want to do awesome ministry things, change the way christians are viewed in todays society, change the way the gay community views christians, save marriages, prevent abortions, go to grad school, get a phD....so much! I feel like i have so little time to do it, or even TRY to accomplish some of those things.

Often times we pray for 'open doors' or a direct 'yes' from God when asking for a direction, but why do we do that? Why dont we just go and do it! If God wants us to do something he will let it happen. But realistically, when would i ever have time to do all this? And i always forget that these things cost a lot of money. I mean God did place all these things in my soul for a reason right? If he didnt want me thinking about them i dont think he would have placed them there. The ability to dream is a blessing and a curse at the same time, it makes me passionate and excited about so many different things but at the same time makes me view reality in a harsh way, knowing that more then half of my dreams will never get to happen. I'm only one person, a tiny person...it will be merely impossible for all these goals to be accomplished successfully by myself.


...His love is boundless